Embracing the Beauty and Wisdom of Women Over 50: A Call for Authentic Representation
7 Shocking Facts:
The beauty industry displays a lack of acknowledgement and comprehension of older consumers which is evident in new brand after new brand that purports to celebrate diversity while mostly ignoring anyone over 35
“Broadcasters behave as though the viewing public have to be protected from the sight of an older woman and that’s just rude. There is nothing wrong with being an older woman. We’ve got to fight back against this sense that older women are less valuable, whereas men accumulate wisdom, authority and experience as they age.” - Harriet Harman quoted in Martinson
Figures from the Australian Bureau of Statistics found a 31% increase in older women experiencing homelessness since 2011, while men experiencing homelessness increased by 26% (http://www.abs.gov.au/ausstats/abs@.nsf/mf/2049.0)
Other economic disparities persist, with 34% of women aged over 60 living in permanent income poverty, according to a 2016 report from Monash University
A report from the Australian Human Rights Commission found that nearly one-third of workers 50 and over were discriminated against in the workforce, with older women being more adversely impacted than older men (https://www.humanrights.gov.au/our-work/disability-rights/publications/willing-work-national-inquiry-employment-discrimination)
We (Western society) send a message that as you get older, you become less valuable or even irrelevant. Angela Buttimer, MS, NCC, RYT, LPC
Nearly 2 Out of 3 Women Age 50-Plus Regularly Face Discrimination. AARP survey reveals that many women face biases, putting them at risk for mental health issues
Let Me Tell You:
A profound shift is taking place. With rising life expectancies and falling fertility rates worldwide, older populations are finding themselves with more resources to invest in their well-being. Companies that call for authentic representation and engage with older consumers, steering clear of ageist stereotypes, embracing the beauty and wisdom of women over 50, stand to gain from a demographic eager for products that cater to their specific needs.
Fighting Back - Comments by Mature Madonnas:
In the media, I’m finally seeing women who are older and glamorous
I think women evolve into their self-worth
We all really are 16 year olds trapped in older bodies. The brain doesn't age like the body does. We still feel young. – 64 years
“Getting older is not something to be afraid of or a battle ‘to win,’ it’s something to strive for.” Hannah Roberts, global brand director for Avon
“With conscious ageing, you become your own pioneer.” Angela Buttimer, MS, NCC, RYT, LPC
“That I am alive! that I am still limber and able to walk, bike, dance, make love….that I have had many adventures and some 'scars' to show for it!” – 69 years
We are women, we are sexual beings, we are capable of love and compassion, and we don't want to be checked off because of a few wrinkles or white hair
Ageing isn’t what it used to be!
Experience and wisdom now mean our most productive days are in front of us
We are the ones with money to spend – If you want to make some, pay attention to us! – 54 years
5 Ways to Get Bolder as You Get Older:
1. DITCH THE GUILT
Use your freedom for a passion that brings you joy no matter how odd it might seem to someone else. Success is no longer the primary goal. It’s gratitude for the experiences and lessons that are coming our way. Be your authentic self.
2. DOWNSIZE YOUR OBLIGATIONS
Leave responsible behaviour behind for the breeders, the generation now having and raising kids while holding down jobs and careers. We’ve finished that part of our lives.
3. EMBRACE EMBARRASSMENT – IT’S NOT FATAL
Try something new to challenge yourself.
4. TAKE SOME RISKS
An interview on NPR with a doctor who was working in Africa to combat Ebola. The reporter asked the doctor if he didn’t feel that at 60+ he was old to be taking chances like this. The doctor replied that he was the perfect age to risk it. If something happened to him, his family was already raised and cared for. The remaining years in his life were gravy.
5. WHO’S NUMBER ONE
The first step to thriving in your 50’s is to start putting yourself first.
Romance
Nov. 27, 2000 -- On a gorgeous Sunday morning in 1980, a man we'll call Jack Nussbaum rode his motorcycle down the California coast to see a woman who was interested in buying his Arabian horse. Olivia Rogers (not her real name) was a successful doctor, separated from her husband and the mother of four teenagers. From the moment Jack and Olivia met, they couldn't stop talking. Morning turned to evening. She didn't buy his horse, but he was smitten.
"I never asked her age," says Nussbaum, a software developer in San Francisco. "I figured she was probably a dozen years older. It didn't matter to me because she was young of mind and spirit." In fact, she was 55 and quite convinced that, at 35, he was far too young for her. "The age difference was always an inhibitor for her," he says. "She figured this was never going to last."
Twenty years later, they're still together. They're in a committed relationship and very much in love. She's 75 and a retired pediatrician in good health; he's 55 and continues to work. Over a lunch of Chinese food, Nussbaum positively beams as he describes the merits of being involved with an older woman and, in particular, Olivia. Twice divorced, Nussbaum says he had developed a habit of trying to tell women who were his age or younger how to live their lives.
"The first time I opened my mouth to say something to Olivia about what she should do, I stopped," he recalls. "Here she was this utterly charming, competent doctor who'd raised four children. Who was I to tell her anything?" He says, "It was a lesson: I was with a mature and powerful woman."
******************************
If an older woman offers wisdom and experience, a younger man offers new ideas, particularly about gender roles, says Diane Smith, 44, a registered nurse in Urbana, Ill., who is married to a man 14 years her junior. "I find men my age still looking for the wife that is supposed to take care of them," she says. "I personally wanted a man who could and would take care of himself."
Divorced with three daughters who are 20, 13, and 10 years old, Smith wasn't interested in having more children, and that was fine with her new husband, so they avoided that potential conflict. But it took her a while to believe he would choose her 40-year-old body over that of a younger woman.
"The body image thing is really a hot spot," she says. "Women just can't understand why a man would want an ageing woman when there are all those fit, cutesy young bodies out there. Most men who want an older woman see those cute girls as young and dumb. They thrive on the sophistication, experience, and knowledge an older woman brings to the relationship."
******************************
And then we kissed.
Now, a kiss has always been a big deal for me. It is sacred (more than the act itself). And this kiss was wonderful. When you feel passion you do not feel that you are in an age-gap love affair or you are kissing an older woman. It is only the kiss that matters.
******************************
From Sarasota, Fla.: My wife is 20 years older, and we’ve been married for 37 years. She is the best thing that ever happened to me.
******************************
My husband is 18 years younger, and we’ve been married 15 years. My family had a little heartburn over it until they realised our commitment was genuine. My two adult children were sceptical, but came around when they realised he had my best interests at heart. His family members all have ghosts in their own closets and are generally non-judgmental. Sometimes when I worry over a new wrinkle, he’ll say, “Honey, I could do younger, but I could never do better.” — Not Maude
******************************
Boston: My maternal grandparents married in 1912. The scandal was huge and included great-aunts fainting all over the place. She was 40 and he was 28. From all accounts, they were perfectly suited and lived a happy life. Go for it. Gifts are meant to be enjoyed.
******************************
Washington: My husband and I met when he was 20 and I was 46. We’ve been together 19 years. Yes, our friends and family were concerned and upset. We smiled and said we assumed people who cared for us would be pleased we were so happy.
******************************
Texas: My husband is 22 years younger, and we’ve been together for 12 years. The only time our age difference becomes awkward is when the conversation pertains to events that happened before his time. My older son was apprehensive when I announced our engagement, but he has come around.
******************************
Louisiana: I’m 51. My husband is 30. His parents never cared about the age difference. What matters to them is that their son is happy.
******************************
Chicago: My two grown sons, ages 31 and 35, are both in successful long-term relationships with older women. While I had to re-adjust my thinking about having biological grandchildren, I am proud that both sons play active roles in the lives of their partners’ children, and I make an effort to do the same.
******************************
Personal Comment
Well, I’ve just hit 61 and I will tell you, I ain’t having a bar of it ! I don’t have to feel my age, act my age, or be my age. I am still drinking wine, checking out the ripped guys, making plans, studying and making my brain work hard. I want to be learning and growing til the day I die !
How do you move and groove as you leave your youth behind ? What’s new on your horizon ? How are you embracing the beauty and wisdom of women over 50 ? What is your call for authentic representation ?